After living abroad for almost 15 years, I came back to New Zealand at the beginning of 2010. For the previous 5 years I lived and worked as a teacher in an Aboriginal community in the far north of Australia. It was an isolated community that was only reachable by boat or a single daily flight. English was often a third or fourth language for the indigenous population and their traditional way of life was in many ways still intact. Being immersed in their culture, I learnt their language and was adopted into a local family. During my time there I developed a deep understanding and respect for their culture. I only mention this as a reminder to myself of where I have been and where I am now.
On returning home after having been away for so long, I noticed how much New Zealand had changed in terms of its focus on honouring the Treaty of Waitangi (at least in the media and the attempts by Government Agencies to promote our bi-cultural status). This was evident to me as I began teaching at a school in South Auckland. Many of the ākonga in my class spent their weekends at their local marae and many of them spoke Te reo Māori. When I realised that I would have to teach Te reo to my class, I experienced what I have now come to understand as ‘Pakeha Paralysis’, a term used by Alex Hotere-Barnes (2019) in the “Land of the Long White Cloud: Episode 4 - 'Pākehā' Paralysis", to explain the fear I had of trying and failing to teach Te reo Māori to my ākonga.
I continued to suffer from ‘Pākehā Paralysis’ as I moved to the West Coast of the South Island to teach. My way of masking this was to connect with a colleague who taught at a full immersion school in the North Island. We arranged regular Skype meetings so that his ākonga could teach mine Te reo Māori. I justified this as Tuakana Teina and gave myself a pat on the back for being culturally responsive, when in fact it was me hiding my ‘Pākehā” paralysis’.
Now living and teaching in Christchurch, in a far more culturally aware and culturally responsive school, I continue to reflect on why I was so better able to embrace culture living in an Indigenous community in Northern Australia than I have been living back in New Zealand. One of the conclusions I have come to is that living in an indigenous community, I was definitely the minority culture. I was immersed in the community and their way of life. I was surrounded by native speakers who became my family, and with much humour, helped me to understand, not only their language, but the world through their eyes. Replicating that, here in New Zealand, is difficult, but should not be a barrier and should not be a reason for me to continue to demonstrate my own Pākehā”paralysis’.
Having listened to Dr Ann Milne speak on several occasions, it has made me think about how I can begin to “Colour in the white spaces” (Milne, 2017) in my own context. I have still not discovered an answer to this, but I continue to reflect on it and to consider what action I can take to overcome my Pākehā”paralysis’. One thing I am sure of is that my willingness to continue learning will help me get to where I need to be. This is already happening. After being introduced to the ‘Mauri Model’ Potahu, T. W. (2011) and learning about the different states of being, I have a better understanding of where I am and where I need to go. I now realise that I have been in a state of ‘Mauri Moe’, which is to say, pretty much inactive. I am beginning to feel ‘Mauri Oho’, which feels like a sense of waking up to what is possible and my aim is to achieve ‘Mauri Ora’ where I will be actively engaged in Te reo and Tikanga Māori. I do this not because it is expected of me, but because I have experienced the richness of knowing and understanding what culture means to indigenous people. I want to do it out of respect for the indigenous people of the place I call home and to live with the richness that can be achieved by living in a truly bi-cultural society.
Hotere-Barnes, A. 2019. “Land of the Long White Cloud. https://www.nzherald.co.nz/nz/news/article.cfm?c_id=1&objectid=12276665
Milne, A.(2017).Coloring in the white spaces: reclaiming cultural identity in whitestream schools. New York: Peter Lang Publishing, Inc.
Potahu, T. W. (2011). Mauri - Rethinking Human Wellbeing. MAI Review, 3, 1-12.
Comments
Post a Comment